Conversations with My Best Friend

Jill suffers through an injury at work, resulting in a full on thumb cast.

Jill suffers through an injury at work, resulting in a full on thumb cast.

Don't ride the train with pirates.

Jessica: There is this man with an eye patch on the train. Either he is secretly a pirate or a serial killer. Can't tell. Oh and its just the two of us in this cart...

Jill: If you don't respond to this text in the next 5 minutes, I'll know which one he is he is....

Sad Attempt at Inside Jokes.

Jill: ok. man Larry is on Facebook. I should Facebook chat him.

Jessica: yeah be like, hey buddy good luck.. and have a Pirates of the Caribbean inside joke, because he's going to the Caribbean.

Jill: HAHAHAHAH. Be like, don't get kidnapped by pirates

Jessica: yeah and do a little chuckle... maybe even a courtesy laugh at the sad attempt of an inside joke.

Jill: LOL. that's possibly one of the greatest lines you ever had

Fixing cars is a man's job.

Jill: So my car keeps showing these signs. I have no idea what they mean.

Jessica: What do they look like?

Jill: I don't know. One legit looks like a fish bowl with two fishes kissing and other one looks like the rear of my car is shooting out flames of fire

Jessica: What the fuck.

Jessica: We need men

Jill: 2012...make it happen.

We like to talk about boys.

Jill: So, Mitch Facebook messaged me.

Jessica: What he say?

Jill: Asking about work...I think he is mad that I didn't tell him I accepted the job

Jessica: What did you say?

Jessica: Weren't you guys supposed to go out for dinner?

Jill: I told him I was busy and forgot....and yes we were "supposed to"

Jill: I feel like that's going to be the next thing he asks me

Jessica: When's that going to happen?

Jill: Next year...when I start my real job in the company cafeteria

Jessica: Make a joke and be like yeah we can get lunch at work and when he laughs be like "I'm serious"

Mean Girls exist at any age

Jessica: I'm waiting for her to apologize

Jessica: but in the words of the great One Republic "it's too late to apologize"

Jill: I know you are dead serious, but that was pretty fucking funny.

Never ACTUALLY Date Your Boss. Just Think About It... A lot.

Jessica: I think he likes you

Jill: Avoid Avoid Avoid

Jessica: You know you want him. When do you work with him next?

Jill: I think Tuesday...fuck I work Tuesday through Saturday

Jessica: WTF?

Jessica: Christmas Eve?

Jessica: SOB

Jessica: S.O.B

Jessica: Son of a bitch

Jessica: Why?

Jessica: Maybe if you start sleeping with him you would get better hours.....I mean

Holiday Dating Tips

Jill: So, Kevin is planning to have a holiday party at his place.

Jessica: Well, there you go.

Jill: Goddamnit

Jessica: Single for the holidays? Nothing catches the eye of that one cutie at any holiday party like wearing a cute outfit.

Jessica: Dating tips are the worst.

Jill: Stop quoting Yahoo Shine.

Work sucks, I would rather be napping.

Jessica: Wow they just called me into work right now...

Jill: Lol wtf, why would you answer?

Jessica: : Haha I was taking a nap so I answered all groggy like. She was like are you sleeping? I'm like no I don't feel well bahaha

Jill: Hahah that's the worst

Jessica: Brownie points for taking naps, yah?

Jill: And you make fun of me for taking naps....but 10 points for Gryffindor

Jessica: An extra 20 for not going into work AND napping boom house cup bitches.

Jill: Damn shit got real at Hogwarts....

Your guy friend's ex-girl friend is not your friend

Jill: So, Samantha texted me.

Jessica: Ew what did that "thing" say?

Jill: She asked for my zip code....I ingored it.

Jessica: LOL